An advantage of working in the lower rungs of the medical hierarchy is that one is constantly exposed to bumbling idiots. It is easy to screw up in the medical profession be it a doctor or a ward boy; because there is a minimum prerequisite that applies to everyone here - and that is Common Sense.
And Common Sense, my friends, or rather the lack of it is what makes life in my clinic so enjoyable.
Case 1.
Lipoma Excision
And so one fine day, towards the end of my 2 month Surgical Rotation, I was called to assist a Senior Resident in the Excision of a Lipoma ( a lump of fat). So, being the jolly good intern that I was (those were the infancy days, the last of the few that I thought I'd actually continue being a Doctor) - I washed my hands (scrubbed? in the Minor OT? Ha- that one's for the Dettol ads) put on a pair of gloves (I trust the autoclave as much as the roadside samosa-wallah) and started assisting.
The SR, the bumbling idiot that he was kept on fucking around with the Local Anaesthesia and incision. Pretty soon we got used to the groans and cries of the patient who was either having a curious resistance to the effect of Lignocaine or was just being treated by a couple of idiots.
Towards the end of the bloody ordeal, we noticed that the patient was silent for a while. The doc then told him "Baba, only a few minutes remaining, don't worry". No answer. "Baba.. did you hear me? It's almost done" No answer. "Baba!" Now even I was getting worried. What the fuck is going on? I shook him and asked "Baba!!" He's suddenly awake now - "Huh?? What? My name is not Baba!"
Well. If you didn't find that funny, the story is not yet over, dumbass. The bumbling fool had left a bit of the lump in the patients neck and overlooked to remove it before stitching him up. He noticed it - he saw that even I could notice it - and then to Baba "Uhh.. Look here, this kind of lump has a tendency to re-appear, so.. you might need to come back after 6 months."
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2 comments:
As long as we are sharin dumb stories here goes one
A Day In ER with Happy
A guy with twisted grt toe had come to the er to change his dressin... we told the nurse to remove the dressin but dat fool removed the entire dressin i mean even the support which was keepin it in the anatomical postion.... We saw dat n were very scared.. d toe got twisted again .. so told my frnd to man the door(for d fear dat the CMO might come in n kick our ass to d moon) i quickly (i have never worked so quickly in my life .. not kiddin) padded it up got d toe to d anat. position and told the guy dat we wanted to c if it were fixed and told him to report to d Ortho OPD the NEXT day
And ofcourse we took off from the ER
Hahaha with Happy eh
he should have gone to the ortho opd only what was the need to come to casualty! we have other things to do in er! hahah
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